Walking Alone
Another woman is attacked in a Philadelphia Septa Station.
How many people think she shouldered some of the blame because she was by herself? Did a small part of your mind react with, "Well, she shouldn't have been alone." Or, "Why did she stop to help him with directions?" Or, "What was she wearing?"
It has to stop, these words that were implanted in our psyche years ago. Girls are taught to keep their voices down, not to make waves, to just give him what he wants so he'll stop. The message is that his bad behaviors are justified because of what she did, said, or wore.
Think about it. It doesn't take long to find a few examples in your own life. Have you ever done something even though it made you feel uncomfortable? In the kitchen, at work, even in the bedroom? But, to keep 'the peace', you went ahead and did it anyway.
She had every right to walk by herself.
To think she didn't is to partially blame her and therefore, justify his behavior.
It has to stop. He has to stop.
I've read recent articles on the psychology of a rapist. Within a paragraph they leave the main topic of the rapists and talk about the victim, blame, social norms, masculine tendencies, etc. They start off placing the blame where it belongs, then soon sidestep away from him.
Here is an older article many recent studies quote. Be safe.
